I've been calling my old friends Thor and Heather all weekend in an effort to hit the town, especially last night with St. Patty's Day giving me a good excuse to drink green beer, yet my calls went unreturned.Wouldn't you know, their "platonic" relationship has progressed.
I called this years ago. Please, you could have cut that sexual tension with a cat toe nail clipper.
I hate these so-called married poser cats trying to assimilate into human status quo. I am proud to be a bachelor cat, and Rachel's the only woman for me.
Still I can't help feeling like I'm stuck in some bad sitcom where I'm the single cat.
Meow.
- Max, the Cat
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