Thumbs Up, Roger!

For months, I've been wondering where Roger Ebert has been hiding. Ebert has always been one of my favorite popular film critics. Roger Ebert has suffered a long bout recoving from salivary gland cancer and due to some unsuccessful operations he has lost his ability to speak. Roger, I don't care what you look like! I look forward to reading more of your reviews soon! Read his touching story in the Chicago Sun Times here.

why i miss my Rachelby Max, the cat...

* She buys me stuff even when it's not founder's day.

* She makes me laugh, even though cats don't really laugh.

* She lets me sleep on the Time-Warner Cable box.

* She smells nice and she also hates mayo.

* She isn't the cat sitter.

* She has good taste in cats.

Hurry back!

Meow!

- Max, the Cat
Guest Blogger

total recall

New Yorkers got the shock of their lives a few weeks ago with rat infested Kentaco Bells.

Now my fellow cats and dogs get the shock that several brands of canned food have been recalled due to some corporate rats known as Menu Foods.

Please click on the cats and dogs above for more information on the recall and have your pets checked just in case.

On another note, I would like to call for a recall of Greenies Cat Treats. They taste like ass.

Meow.

- Max, the Cat
Guest Blogger

all you have to do is dream

Dear Rachel:

Do not be alarmed if my availability in the apartment changes in the upcoming months.

I have joined the Pilobolus Dance Theatre, and my new schedule is very demanding.

I know how much this may come as a disappointment to you, but I hope that you will please be understanding of my inner desires.

It was joining this or the Hollywood Film Chorale Sound Effects Choir, and all I can do is meow.

All the best,

Max, the cat

PS - My official publicity photo...

lone pussy

I've been calling my old friends Thor and Heather all weekend in an effort to hit the town, especially last night with St. Patty's Day giving me a good excuse to drink green beer, yet my calls went unreturned.



Wouldn't you know, their "platonic" relationship has progressed.

I called this years ago. Please, you could have cut that sexual tension with a cat toe nail clipper.

I hate these so-called married poser cats trying to assimilate into human status quo. I am proud to be a bachelor cat, and Rachel's the only woman for me.

Still I can't help feeling like I'm stuck in some bad sitcom where I'm the single cat.

Meow.

- Max, the Cat
Guest Blogger

what's warm about global warming?

Today, this cat's stayin' indoors.

While my owner gallivants all over the tropics, I get stuck in Category 6: Day of Destruction.

Lucky for me Lifetime Television for Women, gay men, and cats is showing hour long blocks of Golden Girls, Reba, and Still Standing. I'm not quite sure what that last show is, but I'm a sucker for fat guy/skinny wife shows.

Meow.

Max, the cat
Guest Blogger

I'm gonna fix that ratthat's what I'm gonna do

With my owner out of the house, it's the purrfect time for this cat to hit the town.

I am spending most of the day watching my soaps, but I did manage to wake up early for a delicious rat-snack at the Kentaco Bell recently closed on West 4th Street.

Okay, I lie. The doors were closed, and thanks to the board of health, not a rat could be found.


Off to Marc Jacobs later this afternoon for a new collar. More to blog tomorrow.

Meow.

- Max, the Cat
Guest Blogger

Catblogging by MJ Cat

I'm off to Aruba so MJ Cat will be catblogging again while I'm away. Last year, he was out of control when I was on my vacation. He stole cupcakes from Magnolia Bakery, tried on clothes at Marc Jacobs, went to a Tribeca Foam Party and made the cover of Cat Fancy. I'm curious what adventures he'll have this year. Will he break into the Waverly Inn with Ms. Chat? Will he go to Bungalow 8 with Lohan? Will he shave off all his fur like Britney? I can't wait to see what he's up to this year!

Big Black Hole Tuesday

It's been a while since I've been in the Big Black Hole, but with Mercury in retrograde, I again have many unanswered questions?
1. What does he want from me?
2. Whose idea was it to have Pilobolus on the Oscars?
3. What is going on with the Druskin plan?
4. Where were Britney's handlers?
5. Why does MJ Cat want to bite me in the middle of the night?