TomKitten Gossip: Exclusive Gossip

I just ran into Big Hands Meaghan at Citarella and although she is a slightly unreliable source, she is slightly connected to the higher powers that be. In any case, BHM told me that Katie Holmes is actually carrying the frozen sperm of Scientology leader L. Ron Hubbard. I don't know if this is true, but I feel compelled to report this piece of celebrity gossip.